Be The Field

 

drop

thirsty for a drop of
movement
a splash
onto my white
primer
a brush stroke
a swirl
a splat
a drop even

paint mesunset depth
like sky
with orange and blue and pink and green and purple and
violet and…
perspective and light and black and cloud and
depth

the sea rages on
churned red brown ocean
foams sepia
hurls herself at the sand
seaweed pulled piles
gasp and bubble

today in Texas
the hale was the size of grapefruit
ruby red splatters
fed
cracked hungry earth

Deepak Chopra says
“you are a field of all possibilities”

sea rages onfly with the birds
ride with the waves
dive with the dolphins
slurp up the brine
left on shore
let it spill over
drip down my chin
make a mess
of perfection

 

 

as I breathe in
I am the field
as I breathe out
of all possibilities

Just this…

 

starlit nightsweet smell of yam baking in the oven
fat orange cat by my side
sound of metal hitting metal as the drum of the drier turns
the music of an afternoon at home
the fog has rolled in
the sky is grey
the sun will shine again
tomorrow maybe
the sky will turn
the fog will leave
we’ll see stars
when we look up

this is my life
today
quiet
a day of reaching in and reaching out
of phone calls and emails
of questions and answers
of planning and presenting
of moving and being still

this is my lifevision presents
today
a soft thought
floats from the sky
catches in the perfect
black curl
at the base of my neck
a soft thought
that I retrieve and digest

 

a soft thought

a quiet simple soft thought
a soft thought
in a simple inhale

This is life
This is a life
This is my life

 

More on the State of NAKED

 

Officially defined as:

  1. bare of any covering
  2. stripped
  3. without the customary covering
maskedwoman

hidden truth

What is customary covering?
What I’m supposed to do?
What I’m supposed to be?
What I’m supposed to act like, be like, look like?
What I should … blah blah blah

Get my drift?

I don’t want to be usual
I want to be.
PERIOD.
Just be.
Free to be
easy to be
fun to be.
PERIOD.
Just be me.
PERIOD,
Exclamation point!

It’s been an interesting week.
Being sick sucks

throat red,
burning flame,
dragon breathing
singing the ceiling, my sheets, my husbandfirebreather
snoring smoke in my sleep.
My head gripped
in a vice
the muck pushing up
from deep inside of somewhere
who knew that was lurking
waiting for an opening
to ooze its way through
my body
snaking around organs
pushing up expanding
through my throat
pushing
oozing
oozing
up filling my head
The pounding
Ba boom ba boom ba boom
Blocking my bird’s eye view
To my life

You get my drift.

No focus
no clarity
ahhhh that might not be accurate
no
there was.

Here’s the thing.

I let go and dove into
the green guck
the sleep
the chicken soup
zinc lozenges
vitamin C

and me.

Deep
I dove
stroking through it all
the dragon breath and fire and fog.
I came out
on the other end
really getting it.

Get my drift?

‘I got it’   okay bad inside-dating-myself-kind-of-joke (go rent Semi Tough)

Here’s the thing,
even though I had a new client
to service
a speaking gig
to prepare for
a book
to write
a post
to post (first week I didn’t post on this blog since July)
a song
to dance to
a life
to live
here’s the thing
it’s was all okay
it is all okay
ALL okay.

Everything worked out
I’m writing now
the pounding stopped
and
I see even more clearly
I caught some light.

fogclears

on a clear day…

It’s like when the fog clears
at the beach

the wind blows through
the sun shines bright
the sky is a shade of blue
that’s so fresh
so clean
so blue
that’s it’s hard to capture
even in a picture
and well that’s how I feel

I’m on the other side
a little bit more naked
a feel for
taste of
caress of
nude kiss of
my
naked,

I peeled another layer.
Underneath I discovered
baby smooth, blushing me, smiling in my birthday suit.

Will I find there are even more layers?

skinnydip pier

let’s go for a dip

I think yes
And you know what?
I’m excited to keep on peeling,
stripping, wriggling, loosening, slinking out of more and more and even more layers…

Who’s in for a skinny dip?

Let’s Get Naked

Billboard at Washington & Hauser

An amazon blonde stretching her shirt in her hands, tugging, arms crossed pulling her shirt over her head. She’s frozen in time, staring down at me, as I wait at the red light at Washington Blvd.  Maybe she’ll toss it off, letting her top fly across the room so that it lands at her lover’s feet.   Maybe she’ll walk toward him, letting the shirt drag behind her on the floor.  Maybe she’ll get tangled in it as she pulls it over her head.  She’s staring at me from a billboard.  She’s teasing and taunting and wanting, smiling her big amazon smile.  She’s frozen up there. Taunting, “let’s get naked”.  She promises to freeze my fat and make me perfect so I can get naked.

The word NAKED is what grabs me.  Because I’m there, wanting to be naked, stripped down, listening to my hip circling erotic creature playlist.  I am on my way there, to the S Factor, where I’ll dress up to strip down.  Heels, thigh highs with little red bows with white polka dots, a black tutu, sheer tank that I’ll pull, tug, twist, and finally peel over my head revealing my black bra and my skin.  Naked.  Even before I arrive I’m stripping in the car, pulling thought after thought from my brain and tossing one by one out the window, littering traffic with to-do’s and to-don’ts.

 

Wanna Join me?
Pare down, let go, let loose
and circle in?
Wanna get undressed, be undone
and then leave the house?
Wanna be naked with me?

Come on…
it’ll be fun.

I’m peeling off layer after layer after layer
Slipping out of fabrics
Threaded together from
Days ago
Weeks ago
Months ago
Years ago.
I’m untangling myself
from the tattered and worn
patterns of my
habitual weave.

Its time to strip down
tell the truth
love myself
love my choices
love.

I circle my arms around my back
I embrace me
shining
with my off beat dance.
I embrace my words
sing song
language
sometimes only I can understand,
My blue grass, pink skies, green oceans
My paintings
My definitions.

I’m diving off road
cooking off recipe
living off book.

That amazon blonde, that air-brushed to perfection amazon blonde. That cooing at the drivers amazon blonde. That offering to freeze their fat, to become naked-ready amazon blonde.  She dares the world to get perfect and then get naked.  That amazon blonde has it upside down and backwards.

Get naked now, my voice whispers…

Shed my layers, shed my air-brushing, my striving for perfection, shed my trying to hard, my comparing myself to others, my pushing and pulling myself in and out doorways that have already been closed.

Watch me
as I slide a strap from my right shoulder,
as I peel a stocking down my leg, push it over my calf, past my ankle and let it float from my ruby painted toes to the floor.
Watch me
as I tug at the waist band of my panties with my left thumb.
Watch me as I unbutton, unhook, unzip, unleash.

Watch me saunter
wind, twist, swirl, writhe,  circle, curl, stretch, goddess my way into something much more simple.

Watch me…be naked.

ahhhhhhh