Firebombs and Fairies
I’ll just hide here in this lantern, thank you very much.
I don’t like crowds, especially crowds of drunken naked fairies looking to cause trouble. They make fun of me because I don’t like to join
in their mischief. I don’t care. I’m used to the taunts. “Baby! Baby! Hughie is a Baby!!!”
I don’t care.
Cain is trying to get me out of this lantern. It’s the only safe place. The lantern. I made a beeline for it when we got here. I bet a small flock of fairies were swinging from it and it came crashing down, the fairies tumbling and laughing all the while. I’m just glad that I found this lantern. I’m not coming out. It’s enough I’m here at all. God, Jewish guilt is the worst.
Earlier this evening, I was reading in bed, catching up on my New Yorker’s sipping a cup of Chai tea when Cain came into my room.
“Hey.” He said. “Aren’t you going to come to the solstice celebration?”
“No” I said. Last year’s solstice party turned ugly. A riot broke out when the keg ran dry and some crazy fairy almost ripped my wings off my back. Booze and firebombs just don’t mix. “Remember last year?” I asked. “No way I’m subjecting myself to that again.” I turned my attention back to the magazine.
“Come on.” He walked over and sat next to me. He pulled the New Yorker out of my hand and tossed it on the floor. “Hey, I was reading Ellen Bass’ new poem.” I said.
“What is it with you?” he asked. “Why are you such downer?”
“I’m not a downer.” I said. I know that I was disappointing as an older brother. I wanted to be better. I wanted to fit in, I wanted to be able to relax, be myself and have fun with the other fairies. I just couldn’t. I didn’t know how.
It was going to be a nice evening. The solstice sun was setting. It was warm and the sky was a kaleidoscope of pink, orange, and violet. A white mother of pearl guitar pick lay on the floor by my window. The changing colors of the sky seemed to bounce off the pick and bathe the walls of my room in a rainbow glow. I had found the trinket on yesterday’s beach walk. I love picking up little treasures. I have glass bowls of rocks and shells and lucky pennies all over my bedroom. The pick was a great find. I guess Mr. Taco must have swatted the it onto the floor. Cats will play with anything except their cat toys. Ahhhh a cat’s life–the world is their scratching post. Oh to be a house cat.
Cain didn’t need me tonight. He’s stronger than he knows and quite able to go to the celebration without me. He shouldn’t care if I come or not. “You don’t need me.” I said.
“I do,” he said. “I want to get into the Fairy Fraternity.” He said. “They want you to be there too. If you don’t it will reflect badly on our family. You have to go or else I might not get accepted in the frat.” He stood up. “Come on.” He said. “Get up and come with me. Please.” He said.
I shook my head. I pulled the covers up and over my head.
“Please.” He said and yanked the covers down. “Please. Please! PLEEEEAAAASSSSEEEE!” He said.
“God.” I said. “You are such a whiner!”
“It’s really important to me.” He said. “You have to come. I just have to get into the Fraternity. I have to!!!”
I’m such a sucker. Once again here I am doing something for someone else and sacrificing myself in the process. I have to learn how to say no. This isn’t good for me. My cortisol levels are rising. I can feel it. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. Maybe if I focus on this red light. Breathe. Focus on the light. Breathe. I need to calm down. Maybe if I concentrate hard enough I can just will myself gone.
Uh oh, is that Fairy Constantine over there with a fireball? It looks like he’s going to throw it my way.
I gotta get out of here.
Breathe, breathe, focus, and breathe. Relax. I’m a fairy aren’t I? There must be some powers I have, right? Can’t fairies just blink their eyes and disappear?
Shit, what’s the point of wings if you can’t even fly?
**Thank you to two AMAZING writers, Josh Grapes and Lisa Segal. Their unique workshop BEYOND THE FRAME brought this fun piece to me…and I see many more on the horizon…